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Trouble ahead as Mods and Rockers head to Blackpool

Conference preview

So, Davids Davis and Cameron, Ken Clarke, Liam Fox, Andrew Langsley, Edward Leigh, Theresa May and Malcolm Rifkind and their various supporters have set up their seaside camps for a blustery week in Blackpool.

David Willets has already withdrawn from the race, and the Tories must be hoping that at least three of the other contenders will follow suit this week.

Michael Ancram is rumoured to be sounding out the socially conservative Cornerstone group of Conservative MPs to gauge support for a possible bid. Ancram ran as a 'continuity candidate' in 2001 but was disregarded early in a competition which eventually favoured Ian Duncan Smith. Ancram has the very real chance of becoming the next Sir Alec Douglas Home, without the year in Number Ten.

David Davis seems determined to cast off his reputation as unwilling to make the hard yards. Rumours are already circulating that he and his supporters are running an ABC strategy - Anyone But Clarke - to kill off the chances of his main rival. Davis has taken to calling himself the 'Heineken Candidate' because, he says, he reaches parts of the electorate that other candidates cannot.

David Cameron who, along with Ken Clarke, actually appears to be enjoying himself, likened himself to Coke in response to Mr Davis' analogy. He said that voters "just want the real thing". When asked if he was the real thing he replied "absolutely". Vodka and Coke then.

Ken Clarke looked to be in his element last night. He arrived at his hotel relaxed and casually dressed, looking every bit the 'big beast' he asserts to be. His halcyon days in the leftist press seem to be over though. It had previously been the policy of the Guardian to support Clarke, sighting his Europhile persuasions as reason enough, and then to hit him hard over his links to the tobacco industry if her were to be elected leader. However, some of the ammo was obviously getting to hot for storage and today the Berliner Boys abandoned their bear-trap policy and led with 'Clarke Accused in Tobacco Row', reporting claims that Big Ken had mislead parliament in evidence he gave to a select committee about BAT's role in tobacco smuggling.

The current darling of the left-wing press, surprisingly, seems to be David Davis. On Friday, the Guardian ran an editorial on the two Davids, Cameron and Davis, both of whom had their campaign launches overshadowed by the ill-treatment of Walter Wolfgang in Brighton. The editorial leant heavily in Davis' favour, for no good reason, it seems, other than the council house/single mother background he shares with James Ramsey MacDonald. Cameron was dismissed as a 'Toff', whilst Davis was lauded as a 'Tough'. Is the new plan to set up Davis as a right-wing working class hero before knocking him down?

What we can be certain of is that after this week the Tories will have done their best to tear themselves apart and still won't have decided upon who their new leader will be. We'll update you with regular body counts and gory details as the Conservative party attempts to pick a fight with itself and lose.