The Policy Blender

inspired!

Right here Chris, you know you want to.

go on,go on,go on

(go on)

one more

Ok, done now.

And this man nearly became a candidate for an election. It makes you wonder why the nation is completely uninterested in politics.

I hope you were suitably gentle in consoling young Jeremy; he's suffered greatly since his parents dispensed with the services of 'nanny' eighteen months ago.

I have very little time for 'Conservative Future', as the new Young Conservatives are now called following the run-in with Stormin' Norman a while back.

I ran into a bunch of them at the conference a few years ago. They flit about the place in matching T-shirts grinning continuously and bang on about motions and elections and debates that nobody hears about. They spend half their time trying to look cool and the other half being courted by MPs who want to look cool.

I'd imagine it's the same for all parties. I had a run in with a bunch of Young LibDems at a count during the 2001 election. If you think LibDem MPs are smug self-righteous bastards, prepare yourself for the next generation. They even tried to recruit me with the line 'we used to be Tories but then we grew up'. I was actually lost for words.

I've met young Blairites too - they're quite a different breed from the youthful variations of the various left-wing splinter groups linked above. In fact, one who I had met on a Trades Union trip who had boasted of being in a Labour 'dirty tricks team' I then met him again at the Tory conference. He was sporting a press pass, courtesy of the BBC. Needless to say, he was pretty bloody shocked to see me.

My Trades Union days provided some good sport. One of the most notable occasions was a trip to Belgium, for which I took along two friends (for security reasons, let's call them 'Dai' and 'Big Kim'). After some pretty serious intoxification, it was decided that a beach party was what was required - in the hotel. Cue a slightly vague and only semi-coherent Ben - wheeling a mini-bar from one hotel room to another in beach shorts, bare feet, open Hawaiian shirt, bright orange sun hat and sunglasses - bumping into the president of the Trades Union Committee and some senior colleagues. The simple explanation "beach party" seemed to suffice, which was fortunate.

For the rest of the trip we gained a reputation for partying, so we made an effort to be more inclusive. The fox hunting debate we initiated on the train on the way home was just the ticket. :-)